Prepare for the Divorce

“I now un-pronounce you husband and wife…”

You’ve followed self-help books, listened to spiritual advice, read and re-read websites promoting a healthy marriage, yet you are still not convinced that anything will save your marriage. Then you must prepare for a DIVORCE. It is not the end of the world for yourself, your spouse, or even for the children, if you have any. Legal aid, low cost or free telephone consultations offered by attorneys, and internet sites that will provide all the information you need to plan your divorce.

How do you cope with the decision to end your marriage completely? What do you tell people? How are your finances divided? Who will get custody of the children? How much is this battle going to cost? What forms do I need to prepare myself for the future?

There are several options regarding a divorce.  Some of which include, but are not limited to the following:

  1. get an arbitrator, such as a judge to settle your petition for divorce
  2. allow a mediator to listen to both sides and assist with settlement negotiations without having to go to court
  3. opt for an uncontested divorce where both parties agree to the negotiated terms and agree on all terms negotiated
  4. a collaborative divorce which is a newer form of family law is less expensive than having to go to court

Dads and moms have options available to them to help with child support and child custody, dividing property, retaining lawyers and paying for legal fees. In all of your negotiations, good or bad, please think about how your children will cope with the divorce. Seek professional and/or spiritual counseling to help yourself and your children andd remind them constantly that the divorce is not their fault. Mistakes happen. The institution of marriage may not have been a good fit for you or your spouse with each other. Stay focused. Stay positive. Stay friends.

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